Feeling better...

Hello everyone out there.

No, I haven't died.

Yes, I have been a hermit.

The word "hermit" always reminds me of the Babysitters' Club books. I think, in one of them, there is a reference to some random neighbor who was a hermit, and apparently, would subsist on nothing but dandelions.

Random, I know, but that's how my brain works sometimes.

Anyway, I have been a hermit lately. I have been canceling plans, I have been holed up in my house. It's fantastic, absolutely fantastic.

This past week, I got lots more rest than I thought I would. And I actually started feeling like myself again. Being away from the pressure of my job (or that I won't have a job...ha), not to mention not dealing with kids, not worrying about the wedding, getting more sleep, etc....it's been really nice.

And I still have about a week left!

Of course, I woke up today feeling yuck. And this week is much busier than last week.

But, I'm going to keep resting.

Please forgive me if I haven't called you. I need to rest. At some point, I'll come out of this funk. I predict next August, after I'm finished with grad school and I KNOW that I have a job.

Thank you for your patience. I love you all - even if I have disappeared.

Rest...finally

I'm not really great at resting. Things have to literally STOP for me to rest. That's why my best rest comes during vacation time - spring break, winter break, summer break. All well and good...normally.

Except that the past two summers have been mostly full of school. (I love school! But it's not resting.) And this August, when I got back, I dove into wedding planning. (I love planning my wedding! But it's also not resting.)

Sometimes, God needs to whack me on the head to get me to stop. Sometimes, I won't stop until He REALLY whacks me on the head - or the whole body, if need be.

So, He did that.

Came home after a relatively normal day at work Monday, sat on the couch, and developed a 101 degree fever in a few hours. I haven't had a fever since I had my appendix out - which, last I remembered, required a trip to the hospital. Apparently, this was serious.

Went to the doctor on Tuesday, and he told me I had a sinus infection. No big - I get them every year, usually 2 or 3 times. But this doctor said, "Don't go back to work until Monday."

Monday???

"But I have concerts...But I have this string teacher in-service thing...But I'm meeting with some other teachers to do thus-and-so...but I have to work out...but...but...but..."

Nope.

Time for me to relax, chill, watch television, movies, and whatever. Time to get pampered by my oh-so-amazing fiancee, who has cooked for me, ran errands, cleaned up, washed dishes, done laundry, and in general stayed by my side so that I didn't have to do anything.

And I am sick. I'm really sick. Sickest I've been in a long time.

But I needed this rest. So I am okay with missing four days of work. Even though I have NEVER missed that much work in a row.

I needed this.

So...

thanks, God.

Pumpkins!

How about a happy post for a change?

(not that my life has miraculously solved itself and gotten totally stress-free. Actually, I may not have a job next year. Yeah. Add THAT to the wedding stress and general sense of "I'm so tired I can't see straight, whose idea was it to go to Michigan for 2 months and write three 20 page papers?" But, that is for a later post. Prayers are always appreciated, though!

So, Kevin and I decided to carve pumpkins last Friday. I insisted that we could not use normal knives for this task - we needed special pumpkin carving knives! When we found those knives at Stater Bros, they also came with those books, with the patterns in them. I have never tried that, and given that my general pumpkin-carving skills are subpar at best, decided, "Why not?"

After Kevin broke the knives, and had to go get NEW knives - 4 sets, to be exact, because hey, we don't want any more breaking! - we ended up with some pretty rad pumpkins. The best I have ever carved, to be exact!

This one is mine.

Hmm, guess I can't put pictures of Kevin's. Well, mine was more awesome, anyway. :) Just kidding, his was sort of a "flaming pumpkin face" thing. Pretty sweet.

They rotted 3 days later. But that is okay - it was still a blast!

Nice to go back and do random childhood stuff.

I miss you all.

Some randomness

...cause that's what my life is like, right now.

This whole "becoming one" thing is a lot more difficult than I thought.

As is wedding planning. All those crazy brides make more sense now.

However, we do have all our major vendors. Next up is invitations. Whoo. At least making the guest list with the parents wasn't a big deal - no stress there.

I love my ring - especially since the stone is from his family. Legacy, heritage, so neat!

It surprises me to hear that I am the subject of much gossip. Makes me regret all the gossip I have spread in my life - and also makes me hope I will resist the next time. Gossip, however, is a particularly "tasty sin," to use the words of a pastor-on-tape. Still...it's odd to be the subject of gossip.

I miss Michigan, and my Michigander friends.

I feel bad because people call me, and I never call them back. :(

I love my fiance!

In 6 months and 5 days, this insanity will be over, and I'll be in Napa, in a cottage, enjoying in-house massages, breakfast pastries delivered to our door, and bike rides to numerous vineyards. Ahhhhh...can I be there now?

So many life changes, all at once. It makes the reasoning behind getting married quickly even more understood - even if you all don't understand it.

I love you all, and I know you don't get me all the time. But that's not my problem.

Kids are crazy.

Kevin is great.

Sleep is amazing. :)

I just have to brag

Okay, so I'm not even sure that anyone reads this anymore, but hey, I can shout out stuff into cyberspace, right? That's my perogative as a blogger. :)

So, this morning, I had a little freak out about the wedding planning stuff. Nothing major - just feeling like I'm not getting my stuff done. We haven't settled on a photographer yet, and yeah, it is the big thing for this month. And we have to do guest lists and invitations and all this stuff...

Anyway, I snapped at my fiance, who was coming over later today. I didn't mean to, but yeah.

After apologizing, I then asked him to do a couple of errands for me. Random stuff - dry cleaning, picking up some random stuff at Home Depot for me, library...blah blah blah. Kevin agreed to do all of these things.

But then during the day, I got some random text messages. They said things like, "I finished the errands. Do you want me to vacuum?" "I cleaned the windows and vacuumed. Anything else you need me to do?"

I got home to a clean, beautiful house, where dinner was waiting for me by candlelight in the dining room. We had a full meal of yummy chicken, rice, broccoli, rolls, and dessert. Then, after dinner, he washed the dishes too!

I don't exactly know how to take all of this - except to be very very grateful.

Thanks, my love.

And the wedding planning screeches to a halt

So much success! It seems obvious that something would get hung up. After all, we've booked a church, a reception place, a DJ, I have a dress...that's a lot. But we went to interview with a photographer, and yeah, not so awesome. Now I have to figure out some other person to use.

Let me say that I do not like bargain or comparison shopping - I'm not good at it at all. :( I get frustrated and say, "That's fine, just give it to me, whatever!" Which is not the best way to go about planning a wedding.

Looks like I'll have to work on that trait.

Ha.

Of course, school starts tomorrow. And I, unlike people who have functional computers and sit at a desk all day, do not have time to do any planning at work. Nope, it's completely me on other hours. I think I'll ditch for a few weeks. :)

We'll see.

Recommendations are always appreciated! :)

Blogging...right...

So life is crazy right now. Obviously. I got engaged, I'm planning a wedding, and I go back to work in less than 2 weeks. Lots to do! But I did promise to keep blogging, so here's a few highlights.

I got a dress! It's beautiful, and lovely, and I feel like a princess in it. It makes me really happy. I want to go back to the store every day and try it on - or at least take a picture in it.

I am really proud of myself for getting back into eating healthy and not snacking as much. I've lost 2 pounds and 2 inches off my waist so far. Thanks to my trainer, I am super inspired! :)

I have great friends who help me. Thanks ladies.

There are so many people who I want to see, and not enough time to see them.

I miss Michigan - and my friends there. :(

It is incredible how much random tiffs you have while planning for a wedding.

Kevin is still looking for a job, but he's gone to a couple of interviews this week, which is good.

School? A little freaked about trying that Music Learning Theory stuff. But if I don't try things, I won't grow as a teacher.

Despite all my complaining, I have a great life - and I love my fiance!

Yes, it's true!

I am engaged! :)

I will have the story up tomorrow or Friday...finishing up grad school is intense. Almost done - 1 more essay, and revisions on a 26-page paper and 2 other essays. Phew!

I am happy, and I DEFINITELY don't want to work. :)

Liz

I'm almost done...

Phew. This has been an incredible summer. Lots of exciting things happening, lots of exciting still to happen...but the big news (as of right now) is that I have one more week left!

Insanity.

I do NOT want to leave. I love being surrounded by my musician friends who are just as intense as I am. I love talking about teaching music - a music educator is an even more specialized niche than a musician! I love walking around campus, or riding my bike - it is so green and beautiful. I can't wait to come back here. And yes, I am seriously considering moving here - someday.

But, I must return back to California. Thankfully, I will have four weeks to recuperate from the hecticness that was my life. I can relax, hang with friends, sunbathe...oh, and get ready for school. Yeah. Not so excited about that. But that's okay. I will make it.

This week, I still have a presentation, a curriculum, three essays...and of course, revising that really large paper (it's at 25 pages right now...crap!). But really, that's not too bad. Which is why I'm having some trouble getting motivated right now, to do anything.

But, Kevin's coming tomorrow! YES!

So, I should work. Guess I'll work. I'll work now. Right.

Enjoy CA, my friends - I'll be back very soon. Michiganders - I will miss you.

Yes, we did...

...talk about country music today. In class. I know, you're totally jealous, right?

I gotta admit, I like the older stuff. Patsy Cline, Tammy Wynette (sp?), Johnny Cash. But man, the stuff out now...not a fan. Give me Sufjan Stevens any day.

In other news - finished another assignment for my curriculum class, which is great. Still working on the psych paper. But I did finish the OTHER curriculum paper, which is due tomorrow. Phew! That felt good. The psych paper is taking longer than I would like - but probably about as long as the research paper did last summer.

Only a week and a half left! I can't believe it. I am sad - California is not as pretty as Michigan. But I'll be back, and I'll get to see all my friends. So that will be nice. :)

Okay, working now...maybe...

The bicycle adventure

(Note: Over the next two weeks, I have three 10-15 page papers, three essays for a final, and a poster to make...not to mention the readings. I'm a little stressed out.)

I tend to react like most people to stress, I think. Or maybe I'm bizarre. Whatever. Basically, I can keep going under a lot of stress - I can keep things going fine, like something boiling on the stove. But at a certain point, if something adds on, I simply freak out, and everything explodes. Usually that "something" is small. I guess it speaks to the level of suppression I use in my life. Whatever. Anyway.

So I had noticed that my bike lock was acting a little funny. Sometimes it would take longer than normal to open it - wiggling the key back and forth, etc. But whatever, no biggie. Yesterday afternoon, after I had done a couple hours of work (and talked to Kevin on Skype - where I freaked out because I was sad to leave my friends here in Michigan...anyway...) I decided to go to the gym. "This will be great! It's 4:30 now, I can get there in 10 minutes, do 30 minutes of cardio, a couple of free weight things, cool-down, come back by 6, eat and shower, start working at 7. Maybe I can punch out that paper tonight! Awesome!"

But no.

I spent 15 minutes playing with my bike lock outside, trying to get it to open. Eventually, obviously, I did - although I locked it with hesitation outside of the gym. Worked out, fine, no problem. Came back out, and spent another 15 minutes working on this lock. Would not budge. At all. Tried someone else's key, wiggled my key forever. I even had one of the employees at the gym bring out some bolt cutters. The bolt cutters starting BENDING with my bike lock. (Bonus - my bike will not get stolen.) Eventually, I had to leave.

I got home at 6:30. Didn't get done eating and showering until 7:30. Called the police department, who said they wouldn't cut my bike lock until I registered my bike online. Fine. Tried to register it online. The site doesn't work - it keeps erasing my answers to the questions. (Remember that it did this last year too, when I decided to forget it.) Sat down, tried to start working, and called Kevin, bawling "I can't do this! I can't! Now I have to go register my stupid bike in order to get the stupid lock cut off! I wasted an hour dealing with this stupid thing and I wanted to get work done and I CAN'T DO THIS!"

Yeah, it was bad. Poor Kevin. He is being very kind, especially considering he got his tonsils out on Tuesday. :( Eventually I calmed down, and got reading done...but not what I wanted to do.

After class today, I called the bike place. I couldn't register it over the phone - I had to come in. I needed the bike serial number. So I walked to my bike. Couldn't find it. Called them again - "It's on the underneath part of the bike - if you turn it over, you can find it." Of course, I can't turn my bike over - it's locked to a bike rack. So I lie on the ground and look for it. I find it, but it's upside and kind of worn off, so I have to go to the other side of the bike and lie down again to write it down. Then I walked to the Student Store to buy a new bike lock. (I bought a cheaper one, because I do NOT want to deal with this again. No u-lock for me, no way.) Then I walked to the parking center to register my bike. Then I walked BACK to my bike and called the police. "Okay, we'll send a parking enforcer right now - they'll be there soon." (Parking enforcer. I wanna be a parking enforcer!) Wait by my bike, and about 15 minutes later, they showed up with these huge cutters that were pneumatic or something. Probably not, but they were very large and intense. He cuts the lock, and I go on my way. That took 1.5 hours today of walking and waiting.

Man.

Hopefully I can be productive this weekend. It's been a frustrating couple of days.

Please admire my picture of the remnants of my lock. This is after walking around in 80 degree weather for 90 minutes. Sweet.

Where is the time going?

How is it already almost Wednesday of my fifth week here? Things are FLYING by. Not a good thing, because I have way too much to do, and I love it here. Don't particularly want to go home. No offense to you guys - you are welcome to join me out here. It's just way more awesome here, in my humble opinion.

Got to spend the weekend at my friend Ali's house in Grand Rapids (western part of the state). Very relaxing, very productive weekend. They are both chill people, so it was like, "Whatever you want to do..." I love that! I got a ton of work done, and ate a lot of really good food. The highlight was definitely Harry Potter on Saturday. Although there are little things we can pick apart that we didn't like, overall - great movie. I particularly liked the teen romance aspect. "She has really nice skin." Classic!

I have 3 papers due in the next 2 weeks. Yep. Busy busy busy. Still rather incommunicado. Sorry. I'll be better when I'm back - August 8th! Less than 3 weeks, insane!

Okay, work now.

I'm sure you've all figured this out...

...but the Beatles' lyrics had a fair amount of innuendo in them. Actually, all of the oldies songs did. How many of those '60s adults recognized them, do you think?

"Please please me, oh yeah, like I please you..."

Right...thanks John and Paul.

Eek!

Wow, I have a lot of stuff to do.

Obviously, since I'm doing a horrible job writing on this lately.

Had a freak-out last night at 12:30. Kevin calmed me down, but yeah. Here is why I am freaked out:

July 24th:
Research Article Review

July 30th:
Methodology Project (8-10 pages)
Another part of the Curriculum Project

July 31st:
Psych Paper (10-15 pages)
Bibliography project (busy work, but still)

August 6th
Final curriculum project

August 7th
Final 3 essays for American history

Not to mention various quizzes, writing assignments, and readings. Yeah. A little freaked out.

Gonna go work now. Write later - hopefully??

(Btw, seriously excited about HP this weekend - with my friend Ali! Awesome!)

The importance of conversation...and good friends

I have a tendency in school to work myself to death. I didn't figure out until my "super senior" year in college that a final on Friday need not be studied for until Wednesday. There is no need for overkill.

After a fantastic weekend with Kevin in Indiana (fireworks! Barbeque! Rain! Small Baptist Churches! Family! Ice Cream! and most of all...KEVIN!), I returned to East Lansing and jumped back into grad school. Even though I got ahead in my readings, I started to feel more and more stressed out. I even started getting a headache this morning - which is rare for me.

But after class was done, I decided to ditch my plan of eating by myself while reading some Curriculum text, and went to lunch with my amazing friend Angela. We hung out and talked for about two hours. I emerged refreshed and happy - and feeling cleansed.

Justin (yay my pastor!) often said that men only say 9,000 words a day, while women in general say 14,000. I had been talking, of course, but I hadn't had one of those heart-to-heart talks with another girl, that is so crucial for my sanity. Angela and I discussed family life, relationships, faith...laughed a lot and learned a lot. She let me rave about Kevin, and also gave me good advice. It was fantastic.

I also went to the gym and did cardio for about 40 minutes. Yay for cardiovascular workouts. :)

Girl talks are essential. Thanks, God, that I have such great friends.

I'm off to Indiana!

I am so excited to see Kevin again. We talk A LOT on the phone, but it's different when you see a person in real life, isn't it? Today I get to pick him up from the airport, and then we are driving down to Indiana. There I will meet a TON of his family. Should be very interesting.

I hope to have some good stories (and pictures!) when I get back. Maybe I'll have blown off an appendage or two playing with fireworks. (Hopefully not - I need all my appendages to play those instruments!)

Happy 4th, everyone! Hope you have a great time with friends and family! Eat lots of good food!

As inspired by Dani...

...I haven't told you what I'm doing this weekend either! Yikes!

Kevin's coming to Detroit, and I am going to pick him up. Yay, I get to see my boyfriend! We are going to drive to Indiana (which is south of Michigan, for all of you who are geographically dumb like me) and I get to meet his family. Intense! We're going to do a family style 4th of July barbeque, and go to his old church on Sunday.

Gotta be honest, I'm most excited (and nervous) about playing with actual fireworks. Like, not in the sky. Like, I get to set them on fire and play with them. Haven't done that since I was 3!

Okay, so I'm a little nervous about meeting the rest of his family too.

I have SO MUCH WORK! It's not even funny. I am caught up for tomorrow, but yeah, haven't started Thursday yet - or Friday's reading. Even though I'm not supposed to have class Friday, cause it's a university holiday. My professor has decided to bless us all with 8am class. Sweet.

Bedtime! It is LATE - at least for me!

WAY TOO MUCH WORK!

Oh man, I got a lot of reading assigned yesterday! Yikes!

I know I haven't been as good at calling people at home this year as last year. I have been much busier than last year, for one thing. The time difference is hard. And, to be honest, I'm enjoying talking to Kevin. :)

I will try to call you - I will try! You can always call me too! :)

Love you all back in CA!

Nice to know I'm consistent across the country

Okay, to tell this story (stories, actually), you need some background info. Otherwise you're going to think I'm nuts. (If you don't already...) These past 2 weeks I've been in a workshop called Music Learning Theory (MLT). MLT was developed in the 1960s, and it's basically a theory on how children learn music. They emphasize singing, chanting (rhythms and stuff - not Gregorian), and moving. One of the aspects of moving is called "flow," which means moving your entire body with no focus on the beat. Sort of like seaweed. Imagine 60 adults doing this, all at the same time. Yeah.

So I was in a group with my girlfriends, and one girl (Marguerite) said we were pretending to be in a garden in her activity. "What kind of things could we move like in a garden?" she asked. Without thinking, I blurted out, "A radish!"

"Um...okay. Radishes are kind of half in and half out of the ground, so we would need to kneel..."

At this point, I lost it completely. I was on the ground laughing and crying so hard. Right about then, my professor walked up. "We don't know what's so funny," they said. "She's being a radish."

(Marguerite said she thought we would suggest things like flowers, or trees, or maybe the wind. Not vegetables.)

Story #2 (It's shorter, I promise...)

The whole entire class (well, half of the class) was participating in the peer teaching activities. One girl was leading us, and she said, "What do birds do in the winter?" Once again, I just blurted out, "Hibernate!" My Michigander friends turned to me in shock (and some disgust), and said, "No...they fly south!" One person said, "What state are you from?"

The reason for this blog post:

Later that evening, we were at a picnic. After discussing my ability to say random things and laugh out loud (I think I was trying not to spit food all over as tears ran down my cheeks), Ali said,

"Man, we should write down everything Liz says. Liz-isms."

I swallowed my food, and exclaimed, "That's what my friends in California do too!"

Nice to know that I have the same effect everywhere.

My presentation

Yay! I finished my two-week long workshop of Music Learning Theory! This is a huge accomplishment for me, so I'm going to relish it.

Yesterday, I had to do a 15-minute presentation. I had to teach 4 different classroom activities that emphasized different tonalities and rhythms. I chose to do a song in Lydian (that focused on rhythm), a song in harmonic minor (which emphasized the resting tone, or tonic), a song in Mixolydian (again, the rhythm), and a major song in 7/8. Sweet!

I was so nervous about it, because this whole form of teaching was completely new to me. I've never worked in depth with MLT - I got only a passing glance at it during college - but this was complete immersion in the theory and practice.

I chose to go first, because that way, I get it done and over with. Only problem - I was going before lunch, which meant that Ed Gordon, the CREATOR of this whole theory, was watching! (Well, he would say that he wasn't the creator - he's just the guy who did the research on how children learn music and published it. But it's his baby, it's his thing. We wouldn't have it without him. How many people have done research on 10,000 kids???)

So I had to do my whole presentation with Ed Gordon watching. Oh man, that made it worse! But I got through it all, even though I sang one of the songs wrong (Angela helped me out, thanks!, and completely lost the Mixolydian tonality. And at the end of it, Ed Gordon - the CREATOR - walked over to me, gave me a hug, cradled my face in his hands, and told me that it was wonderful teaching, that I had done a great job. It brought tears to my eyes!

Later on, my professor told me that he really loved it and was surprised that I had never done anything like this before. Yay!

It feels good to be doing what God wants me to be doing. And because it's what God wants me to do, I can do it well. I know I sound like I'm bragging in here, but I'm really proud of my accomplishments these two weeks. As my friends Ali and Angela said, I stretched myself, and it went well.

Yay!!!

(By the way, for this picture, Ed "charged" me two kisses on the cheek. I gave it to him, because it was either that, or $10. Whatever!)

I know, I know...

I haven't written much this week. I'm suffering from overload/too much to do, with a case of "But I just finished teaching a whole year!" itis.

Tomorrow I have a 15 minute presentation in front of the professor and 25 of my peers. It involves singing songs in mixolydian, minor, major, and Lydian tonalities, with all sorts of activities. We're going to rake things, we're going to act like chimps, we're going to "catch" our resting tone. Should be very very interesting.

Wish me luck - and pray for me!

I can't think of a cute title for this, but...

Last night, I was watching The Jane Austen Book Club on my laptop (go Netflix!). In the middle of the movie, my amazing boyfriend Kevin called. We had talked for a while earlier that day, but he wanted to say goodnight, because he's sweet like that.

Halfway through our phone call, his phone died. No big deal, right? I called him back, left a message on his phone, and went back to my movie.

An hour later, I got a call from another number. It was Kevin, calling on his friend's phone. He said,

"Liz, I'm so sorry, my phone died! Emily offered to let me use her phone, but I didn't know your number. So then I emailed you from her Blackberry, but you didn't respond. So then I called my friend Dave to see if he could look up your number from my T-Mobile account, but he couldn't access it. Then Emily thought that we could text Ricki, and get your number from her. So we did, and she sent it back, and I called you. I've been trying to get ahold of you for the last hour - I didn't want you to worry or be upset or think I had hung up on you."

Honestly, this whole statement (paragraph? monologue?) brought tears to my eyes. I have NEVER, I repeat, NEVER, had a guy go to that much trouble to contact me. The book "He's Just Not That Into You" (which I LOVE - it's harsh advice, but so true!) says that if a guy is "into you," he'll move heaven and earth to contact you. None of this "I lost your phone number" stuff.

I got to witness that last night. And it felt amazing to be the receiver of such attentions.

Thanks, Kevin. You're fantastic.

Ah, the wonders of technology

I am not a technology buff. At all. I am old-fashioned and very very VERY slow to try new gadgets. I just don't care. Sorry people, but I don't.

I remember when Prodigy came out - do you remember that? It was the first email system. I thought, "This is stupid. It'll never catch on."

I remember when AIM became popular. I lost patience with it. All my conversations seemed to consist of "hehehe. :)" Yeah, again. Not interested.

I remember when the iPod came out. I thought - why do I need that? I am totally fine with my CD Walkman. Who needs more than one CD at a time, anyway?

I have slowly but surely converted on all of these gadgets. (well, not AIM. I still prefer Google Chat with gmail - but I'm not at my computer often enough to really use it frequently.)

Yesterday, my amazing boyfriend Kevin introduced me to Skype, and webcams. Yes, okay, I know, they've been around for a while. And yes, I did know what they both were. But to actually SEE my boyfriend, who's 2000 miles away or so - wow! It felt like the future! I immediately went out and bought my own webcam this morning. And we proceeded to talk on the phone...for most of the afternoon. :)

This world comes up with all sorts of newfangled gizmos all the time. I don't think I'll change my ways - at least in terms of adopting things right when they immerge. But, if you can convince me...I'll change.

At least I'm not permanently stubborn, right?

In other news, I'm enjoying re-reading Stephen King's Dark Tower series. More so than doing my homework. Check them out if you get a chance - quality works of fiction, and they're not scary. I promise.

Phew! First week done!

Surprisingly, my first week is done done done. Woohoo! I have one more week of certification in Music Learning Theory to do. Next Monday, the FOUNDER of MLT, Edwin Gordon, is going to be giving the lectures. Pretty amazing - he's like a celebrity in the music ed world! Reminds me of how I felt when I met the clarinetist in the Chicago Symphony. (Despite being from California, I can count my celebrity encounters on one hand.)

So far this week, I have been stretched and challenged in all sorts of ways. I have wrote songs in Lydian, Mixolydian, Phrygian, Aeolian, Dorian, Major, and Minor, and written chants in duple, triple, usual combined and unusual paired meters! Awesome! If you understood that, you are truly a musician!

I have also done a whole bunch of very interesting elementary music things. Elementary music teachers are rather insane - they move a lot. It's called "flow," and it means moving your arms and legs around to the music - but not to the beat. It's supposed to get you to feel the music better and internalize it (also known as "audiation"). I felt rather stupid doing it, but by the end of the week I was moving around like a dinosaur with everybody else! Yes, that is what I said - dinosaurs. Not to mention bubbles, leaves, building snowmen, pretending to be bugs...the list goes on. I wish I could tape the class and post videos, but you might not ever want to talk to me again. :)

I have also gotten to see my friends from last summer. I missed them so much! It's great that we can pick up right where we left off. I am blessed because I have classes with all of them this year. Next year, things will be sadder, because one of them (at least) will be gone. Sigh...I'll have to figure something out...

Thankfully, I have nothing planned for this weekend, besides finishing my 12 different assignments (songs in Locrian! yeah!), going to Meijer (it's like a super Walmart), and doing a Bible study with my awesome boyfriend Kevin. Maybe I'll make it to the gym...maybe. Mostly though, I'm going to relax - my first chance since school got out! Yeah!!!

By the way - yay to my brother Dan, who finished his first year of teaching! Proud of you Dan Face!

So, I will continue to post. Can't guarantee excitement all the time -but that's okay. It's my blog. :) Read it if you want to - especially if you want to laugh at me. :)

??

How do I decide what to wear if it's supposed to be 83 degrees out - and raining? Jeans? So my shoes don't get soaked? Or shorts, so my legs dry? Tank top? I don't know...this is out of my experience...

I may go jeans and a tank top. Because - well, wet shoes are the worst. Hmm....must decide.

I'll write more later, but now I must stare at my (very diminished since all my clothes are in CA) closet.

At it again

Last year at this time (approximately, keeping in mind that I came here a week later last year), I was taking a class in improvisation. It really freaked me out, honestly. Satan used the fact that I was being stretched and uncomfortable to pelt me with lies. But I overcame them, and actually did teach some improvisation with my students this year. Woohoo!

So this week, he started doing it again. I am taking a class in general music (elementary) teaching methods which are (that are? Dani, where's your red pen?) very different than anything I've ever done before. Yesterday, I heard these things:

-You can't do this.
-This is too hard for you.
-You're not a good enough teacher to do this.
-Why should you bother changing? It's too much.

After talking to myself, praying, and talking to my great boyfriend Kevin, I felt a lot better about the whole thing. I told myself these truths:

-I CAN do this.
-It's hard for me now - that doesn't mean it'll be hard for me forever.
-I AM a good teacher, and I CAN do this.
-Change is good, especialy for teachers. How do we expect our kids to learn better than we did?

Today, I felt much calmer and more prepared. But then he started in again! Today I heard:

-This doesn't apply to you - why are you bothering?
-This class is a waste of time.
-You'll never use this stuff.

False false false! Truths:

-ALL music knowledge applies to me - I am a MUSIC teacher.
-This class is not a waste of time.
-I am a creative teacher - I can find ways to use EVERYTHING in my class. I just need to try.

So, yeah. He's still at it. But I can see it now - much more than I could last year at this time. I call that growth.

If you'll excuse me, I need to write songs in Aeolian and Dorian, learn songs in Aeolian and Dorian, write a chant in triple meter, and prepare to teach Learning Sequences activities for about 10 different lessons. I'll write more tomorrow.

Love you all!

My apartment

So, I know you were all wondering about what my new place looks like. Admit it, you were. Well, you're in luck! Here are some pictures for you!!!!

Well, one picture. Honestly, my room isn't that exciting. Maybe I'll put more pictures of it on my Facebook account.

But as you can see, it's pretty sweet digs. Look how huge it is! It has 4 bedrooms for 4 people. My apartment at UCLA had 2 bedrooms, but we still had 4 people in it - thank you, Los Angeles rent prices. It's pretty awesome, I think. So far, none of my other roommates are here yet, but I'm sure they'll show up relatively soon. :)

Back in Michigan!

Hello hello! I am back in Michigan, back in East Lansing, back in...well, not back in my old pad, because I'm living in a new place this year. Rather than live in the dorms (Owen), some of the music teachers and I decided to get an on-campus apartment. (I know, insane, right? 4 music teachers - in one place...crazy. Insert band camp jokes here.)

I'll tell more about my apartment in a later blog, probably - most likely. Very likely. Yeah. Anyway.

It was so great getting here. I had this hilarious cab driver who played me an old R&B song (from the 50s) and tried to get me to guess who it was. I did guess, it was Sam Cook - very cool guy. Check out "You Send Me" if you get a chance. He then played a whole bunch of old R&B and Motown stuff. The most entertaining part was when he put on some mix CD that started out with "Sexual Healing" by Marvin Gaye, and proceeded to include songs about "making love," etc. This was made even more hilarious because he was a rather large guy wearing a huge silver cross, who told me that he didn't follow religion - he just follows Star Wars. No joke. "People are either for the Dark Side or for the Force," he said. He did get me to my new apartment really fast though, so I gave him a big tip.

It's funny being back here. I walked over to CVS to purchase a bunch of random stuff that you need if you are basically furnishing an apartment. I feel so comfortable on this campus. Honestly, it feels like I'm coming home. I don't belong in California, I think. Where do I belong? Especially since most of my friends are in California? I don't know. But coming here feels great - so freeing.

Of course, being in a new apartment, by myself, with no roommates for a week...that's a little lonely.

But I get to go to a wedding tomorrow, and then on Monday, I begin the whirlwind 2 week course in Music Learning Theory. After that, whoosh! It'll fly by.

Keep on coming back! I will try to update daily!

I leave tomorrow!

So tomorrow, I head back to Michigan. What??? Crazy...where has the year gone?

I am very very excited to go back. I am super excited to see my friends again, particularly Abby, Angela, and Ali! :) Yay! I am also excited to be IN school, not teaching, but learning. I love to learn!

I am also a little...anxious? Something? Who knows? I am sick, which makes life not as much fun. I spent the afternoon cleaning, and I suppose I should get to packing. I don't really want to though, to be honest. Packing is so final - especially since I'll be gone for 2 months. 2 months! Wow.

I'm also sad about leaving my friends and my super amazing boyfriend, Kevin. Kevin will be visiting Indiana during 4th of July weekend though, so that's cool. I'm planning on driving (or taking a train, or a bus, or something) down there to meet the rest of his family. Hopefully that will go well!

I began this blog last summer, as I started on the adventure that is my masters. I will be much more diligent in keeping it while I am gone - for that is the reason I started it! Hopefully my life will be full of lots of excitement and wonder as I return to the beautiful state of Michigan. I can't wait!

Keep on reading - I'll write more soon!

Ah, May...

May has not been my friend.

I mean, May usually isn't my friend. May is concert month. May is "I gotta get through this so June can come!" month. But this May, my personal life decided to invade and get crazy as well.

First off, Kevin's mom came to visit. Always a stressful time, meeting the parents of the guy you're dating. It was fine, but you know.

Then, roommate drama. And Kevin got sick.

Then, Knott's Berry Farm with 117 kids. Some of whom thought it was a great idea to put their instruments at the front of the park, and leave them there, because, you know, people will take care of it. Right? Right...

Then, Concert on the Green usual insanity. Outside concert (blech), 250 kids (elementary and middle school), sound system setting up, stands, chairs, moving furniture, 8 different ensembles. Ended up being 2 hours long. Long! Some people I wanted to be there couldn't make it, and our videographer's camera died, so we didn't even get it recorded. (Much apologies were had from the videographer, but still...)

Then, Friday. Took Kevin to ER. Spent the weekend at the hospital with him. He has tonsilitis, mono, and some other bacteria thing. But the mono and the tonsilities is viral, so it can't really be treated with antibiotics. It is stressful watching your boyfriend act differently because he's on morphine. I was there most of the weekend. I wouldn't be any place else - of course. But it wasn't exactly what I planned for the weekend. (A month ago, Kevin and I had talked about going to Catalina. Good thing we didn't book that!)

Anyway. May is almost over. Thank goodness! Hopefully, June will be better.

Now I have to prepare to go back to Michigan...packing. Eek! But I'm excited to go back.

And, of course...to be done with teaching for a while. :)

Yes, I have a boyfriend

Hello all you people out there. Yes, it is true - I do have a boyfriend.

I kept it quiet, because, hey, I am a rather reserved person. Ha! I hear some of you laughing right now. But with stuff like relationships, I don't like to wave them around much - at least not at first. At least not until it becomes official. Which this did, last Friday. So, let the waving around begin! :)

His name is Kevin Brinker. I met him on eharmony, after a person close to me recommended I jump back on. (I had previously been on in May, before my last relationship began basically in June.) She said I wasn't grieving or anything about the end of the last relationship (which stopped in January), and said that it would be a good way to put myself out there without feeling too much pressure, whatever. Anyway.

Kevin contacted me during the first couple of days I was on there. We chatted, we talked on the phone, we went on our first date (to El Torito and Dave and Busters at the Block), we talked on the phone. A lot. Like every day for at least an hour. :) I met some of his friends (all of whom I like - a nice change, by the way), we kept talking on the phone. While I was in New York, I STILL talked to him every night - 2 a.m. in NYC, 11 p.m. here in SoCal. And when I got back, we hung out, and on Friday, he asked me to be his girlfriend (in a roundabout, bashful kind of way that was very adorable).

He is very devoted to Christ. He serves at his church in Brea with the high school ministry there, as well as doing a one-on-one Bible study with the missions pastor. He is from Indiana, and came out in June after graduating. (Yes, he's 2 years younger than me...let the jokes begin. But he's mature, I swear!) He is a great communicator, he loves to talk on the phone (and hates texting). He is super super romantic. He is comfortable talking about all sorts of things. He is also very cute. :)

I'm REALLY enjoying this.

So yes, I want you all to meet him. Whether I want to do a big "meet my boyfriend" party or just do some dinner date things, I haven't decided yet. Probably will start with the small group meeting things at first - and depending on how it's going by the time I leave for Michigan (June 13 - wow!), maybe a party will happen too. (By the way, there is talk that he'll visit me, while I'm there...sigh...)

So, please don't feel left out. I want you to meet him! I'm really enjoying this. Feel free to ask any questions...and I will do my best to answer. :)

Side note - starting a relationship on Facebook is hilarious, by the way, just because of who notices what's going on and who doesn't. I was a little surprised more people did NOT comment when I changed my status. But hey, I know we're all busy, and nobody can keep up with everyone's life.

Mine is going well. :)

I've got a crush...

...on a guy. And he likes me too!

Heeheehee!

More to follow...just felt like being tantalizing today. :)

Most of Ever

Tonight, I got to see my old friends from Fuel. We had a reunion of people who went to New Orleans last March (my idea, oh yeah!). A lot of these people I just don't see very much anymore, for various reasons. It's been hard for me, because I am so community-oriented. I miss Fuel.

But tonight, I got a taste of that again. I got to laugh - so much that tears were streaming down my face and all my eye makeup washed off. I got to get teased by Justin, one of my favorite things - seriously! (Most of ever=greatest, in case you were wondering. At least when you're me, and you're playing Catch Phrase, Music Edition.) I got to catch up and chat with so many people who mean so much to me.

It was fantastic.

And instead of feeling nostalgic and bitter and sad, I felt joyful. I felt peaceful. These people are still my friends. Just because we don't see each other does not mean that we are not still close. I am so thankful that God used these people in big ways in my own life. I am so thankful to still be close to them. I miss them. But I always remember that one day, we will be together forever, in heaven.

In the meantime, I can enjoy our get-togethers and look forward to them with excitement. I can leave with a song in my heart (to be totally cliche). I can thank God for so much.

Truly I am blessed.

(By the way, according to Jeanna we are going to hell when we die. Bummer.)

Phone marathons...

...are fun.

In other news, UCLA lost. Again. At least U$C lost too. And they were beaten by my grad school, awesome!

There are things happening in my life, but nothing that I want to put on here (yet...).

Can't wait to see all my friends from NOLA tomorrow!

I love RENT!

That's it, I think. :)

And God does it again

Several seemingly unrelated events:

Scene: San Bernandino Mountains, Summer 2004. Liz Thomson counsels campers at Arrowbear Music Camp. There she meets an amazing girl named Celeste, who reminds her so much of herself. Celeste is a clarinetist like Liz. They get along fabulously.

Scene: Huntington Beach, 2008. Liz and Celeste get together to play duets. Nerdy, but lots of fun. Liz adds Celeste's number to her new phone.

Scene: Huntington Beach, March 3, 2009. Liz's phone breaks.

Scene: Huntington Beach, March 4, 2009. Liz gets a text message from an unknown number about a UCI concert happening the following week. She saves the message, assuming it's from Celeste.

Scene: 405 Freeway, March 6, 2009. Liz calls her brother, who is super super stressed out about all his first-year teacher duties. He needs, among other things, a clarinet player to help out his high schoolers with their production of Fiddler on the Roof. Liz offers to help, but can't make the big rehearsals. She is concerned, and at a loss as to what to do to help Dan.

Scene: 22 Freeway, March 6, 2009. Liz realizes that she could ask Celeste to do it. After multiple texts to Dan and a phone call to Celeste, Liz secures a clarinet player for Dan's musical. The rehearsals and performances "just happen" to fit in with Celeste's finals schedule. Dan is elated. Liz feels good for helping.


All these things? Knowing Celeste, the phone dying, me receiving a text from Celeste with her number, Dan needing a clarinetist, Celeste being willing to do it and it working around her finals schedule? That's God.

Thanks, God.

A new church in the summer

Today I went with my friend Angela and her brother Ed to Rock Harbor, a daughter church of my main place of worship, Mariners. I have been going to Mariners for a little over 3 years now. It is the first church of which I have been a member. It is the first church where I actually knew the pastor (my awesome mentor, Justin). Needless to say, I was a little nervous about going to Rock Harbor. I had been before with my friend Becky (on a very hard day for me), and I liked it. But I felt this was a big step. This was me saying, perhaps, that it is time for a new place of worship. It is time to try out somewhere else.
But when I got there, everything was fine. Worship was good, Mike Erre gave a great message on 1 Corinthians 5. I was convicted, I was moved, I learned a lot. And while I was there, I heard God say, "There is healing here."
Now we all need healing. But healing for me is crucial right now - it is what I am focusing on in my life. So, it looks like I've found a new place to go to church. Not that I won't go back to Mariners - I still want to take their Intro to Theology class in April. And who knows where I'll end up in 5 years, right? It seems that right now, though, God wants me at Rock Harbor.

In other news...my brain feels less full.

See, during the summer, I always relish the fact that my brain is less full. I am not working (unless I'm doing my masters, like last summer), so I have lots more time (and brain space) to think about other things. Deeper things. Two summers ago I pondered and discovered my lie. My basic belief about my brain and work is that I don't have enough time to do really deep thinking while I'm working. It's just too much.

Lately, however, I have had more time. I have more time to see friends, I have more time to be by myself. It is the first time in a while that I am actually resting. And today, it felt like summer. (Maybe it was the beautiful weather, but I don't think that's just it.) I had time and space to think deep thoughts, and still get my work for school done. It is a glorious feeling.

Is that how I'm supposed to feel all the time? Man, I was WAY too busy.

Who do You say that I am?

A famous quote, said by Jesus to the disciples. Peter, in one of his greatest moments recorded in the Bible, responds "You are the Christ, the Son of God." Jesus praises him for this, and tells him that this fact was revealed to Peter divinely - not just through his own wisdom.

But how many of us ask this question of God? How many of us ask God, "Lord, who am I? Who do You say that I am?"

In light of many recent events in my life, I am once again pondering who I am. I am doing a lot of introspection (not that I don't do this a lot normally, haha), and really trying to let God speak into my life. I am tired of other people telling me who I am, what I should be doing, what I shouldn't be doing, whatever. I am tired of not having my own opinions - and of not valuing the opinions I do have.

Some encourage me to jump right into some activity or some other thing to keep myself busy. I understand that. But part of me feels that I should use this time to sit, and let myself breathe. To really focus, and let God talk to me. I don't need to rush out and meet new people right away. I think it would be better for me to be comfortable with myself. Even if that means allowing myself to feel pain - pain that should have been processed months, years ago.

It is a difficult journey that I have been on for several years. I know God is with me every step of the way. That, I think, is my favorite aspect of God. I praise Him for that. And I hold to Him tightly - every moment.

Waiting, and feeling more cheerful about it

(so I couldn't come up with a more creative title. Sue me.) :)

I was reading John Eldredge's latest book, Walking with God, which focuses on how to hear God's voice more daily. One of his "tips" is to ask God simple questions - questions that are not all tied up in emotions, like, "Should I take this job?" That way, we are not filtering God out or preventing him from speaking because we have strong feelings about the subject.
Eldredge recommends asking God what to read in His Word every day. He said it gives your quiet time more resonance, because the chapters you read very often speak to what you're going through or what you will be going through. (I'm not explaining this very well, but hopefully you're getting the gist.)

So I decided to try it out. And it works! Pretty much every day, I have heard God tell me what to read. Sometimes, it doesn't apply. But more often than not (like 7 out of 10 times), it totally does.

Here are some of the verses that have jumped out at me recently. God has been directing me to the Psalms.

"Be still, and know that I am God." -Psalm 46:10

"I waited patiently for the Lord, and He inclined to me, and heard my cry." -Psalm 40:1 (that one was cool - I heard God say "Psalms" but not which one. But when I opened my Bible, it went right to this passage, and my eyes jumped to it.)

"Wait on the Lord; be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart. Wait, I say, on the Lord!" -Psalm 27:14

Noticing a pattern? Yeah, me too. And today, I really felt peace with the waiting. If you read my last post, you know I was struggling with this. I'd be lying if I said I was totally okay right now. But, I do have a sense of peace that feels divine - it is DEFINITELY not from me. Especially not from me, considering how insane my mind has been lately! I have not felt peace like this since I made the major decision to break up with my ex-boyfriend, 4 years ago.

It should be very interesting to see what I am waiting for. God knows. I will wait for Him - and keep listening to His voice.

Be Still?

Lately, God has been telling me to stop worrying so much. "Be still, and know that I am God." This has been reinforced by Kenton's messages the last two weeks (watch them online at www.marinerschurch.org), not to mention my own discussions with friends.

The problem? I don't really know how to be still. A few years ago, a good friend of mine called me a "Cannonball." Basically, I jump into things wholeheartedly, I fully commit, I don't do things halfway. I have NEVER done things halfway. Church, job, relationships, exercise, eating healthy (or not eating healthy...I down plates of brownies pretty easily) - they all receive the full commitment from Liz.

But what if I'm not supposed to do that? What if the other elements of what I'm diving into are not responding in a like manner? How do I respond to that? Lower my expectations for said thing? Give only what I'm getting? It sounds good, but also not so good. Especially for this cannonball. How do I cannonball halfway? Do I wade into the water? That's lame.

Plus the whole be still thing. I am a champion worrier. I love (hate) to explore all the options of what might happen in my head, running around and around until I am almost paralyzed with anxiety. How do I stop this? I'm not really sure.

God tells me not to worry. "Does this mean, don't worry about it because You're going to fix it, or because it won't matter soon 'cause it's going to end anyway?"

Sigh...

An addiction?

Wow, two posts in one day! I must have had the day off...

I have noticed recently that I love self-help books. Not the really crazy kinds, you know, "Eat your way to losing weight" or...I don't know, I can't come up with any more titles. Anyway, I love them. I read them voraciously. I have a lot of them.

Most of them are by Christian authors, and I do believe that they are meant to help us. But when we turn to them for answers, rather than the Bible or to God, are they really helping us? Just this evening, my friend was going to loan me a book that had some advice I wanted to get. But I left it at her house, accidentally. I was really upset about this - more upset than I should have been. I mean, it's just a person, right? Do they really know that much more than I do about this particular topic? (They probably do, but whatever...)

It's just something I'm noticing in my life lately. I need to remember that it is God, and His Word, that should guide my life. Not a random book that may or may not help me.

And, thus ends...

...my latest cycle of weddings.

My first cycle of weddings was right after college. Gene and Collette, Elizabeth and Barek, Alan and Monica, Tiffany and Ben, Jen and Stephen, Katie and Kolton. Bam bam bam! So many weddings all at once!

Then, a lull...for a couple of years.

Then, Ty and Jessica's (November 07).

Then, the next round, this year: Holli and Huy (May), Nate and Lindsay (August), Michael and Julianne (October), Phil and Kirsten (November) Jacky and Jon (also November, and I didn't go, I am a bad friend... :( ), Doreen and Roland (November), and yesterday, Adam and Dani.

Phew! It's been rather intense.

I love weddings, actually. The romance, the excitement. All the showers and the gifts and the laughter with girls (and guys) you love. Lots of dancing, lots of great food. Lots of meaningful reminders of why God created marriage and what marriage means today. It is a powerful thing.

I also got to bring a date to a wedding this year - twice! For the first time! That was a new experience. I liked it, actually. :) Heeheehee...

So. Done. For a bit. Although I heard a rumor that a friend may be asking soon...plus I have several friends in serious relationships. I'm sure it'll start up again in a bit - and I will love every minute of it!